Animal Magnetism
by Dragon Knight Reina
Summary: COMPLETE! The one who holds the white stone will unconditionally fall for the one who holds the red stone. Or so they say, anyway. Warning! OOCness! Crack fic
1. Beginning

**Disclaimer: Ouran is owned by Bisco Hatori. Concept is loosely based on Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Daybreak. The original concept, set of characters, etc. of HnNKn is owned by Ryuukishi07 and 07****th**** Expansion. Lemme know if I missed any…**

**Also, for you Higurashi fans, I am aware that I mixed up the colors of the beads. It's just loosely based on the idea anyway, so no big deal. Right? :'D  
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Animal Magnetism: Beginning

Hikaru and Kaoru were aghast. Haruhi didn't really just swallow that bead whole, did she? She looked up from her lunch and gave the twins a quizzical expression, clearly unaware of what she had just consumed.

Earlier that day, some gardeners working for the Hitachiin family had dug up a strange box in the garden. A box that contained two strange trinkets: One small, round, white bead and a matching red bead. They were about the size of a dime, but unlike a dime, they were rounded on one side and flat on the other. These beads did not appear to be made of anything particularly rare or precious; in fact, their dull, opaque appearance led Yuzuha Hitachiin and her husband to believe that they were just a couple of worthless rocks. 'Worthless rocks' have no place in a house as rich as the Hitachiin household, so no one was surprised when Yuzuha decided to discard the two beads. But before she could, Kaoru decided to intervene; for some strange reason, he found the beads intriguing. Maybe it was because they matched. Maybe it was because they looked so ancient. Maybe it was because they looked strangely familiar—like he had seen them somewhere before. But where? Before he could really ponder the question more, Kaoru realized that school was about to begin. So he took the box with the two beads and shoved it into his bag. He could ponder about the beads at school. He jumped into the car after his brother and they were off to school.

Unlike his brother, Hikaru didn't really take much of an interest in the two strange trinkets. They just looked like average, ordinary beads to him. On top of it all, they were old and probably dirtier than they looked. What did Kaoru exactly see in them? The answer eluded him. Still, if Kaoru was interested in them, they had to be more than just round pieces of colored rocks.

"Hey, Kaoru," Hikaru piped up.

"Hmm? What's up?" Kaoru responded.

"Why are you carrying that old, dirty box around? Are those beads inside really that interesting?" Hikaru asked.

"Well, yeah. I think I've seen them in a book before, but I'm not sure. I wanted to take them with me so that I could research them a little bit," Kaoru replied.

"Oh. Do you think that they're worth anything?" Hikaru continued to ask.

"I don't think so… Not a substantial amount, anyway," Kaoru mused, "But, I have a feeling that they are more than they appear to be."

Hikaru shrugged and let the topic go. He was sure that Kaoru would let him know if he found out anything about the beads.

School proceeds like normal: Lecture, passing period, lecture, passing period, lecture, passing period, lecture… then finally lunch. Hikaru and Kaoru head off to the cafeteria to get their lunches while Haruhi eats her boxed lunch in the classroom. Just like always. However, when Hikaru and Kaoru return to their classroom, Kaoru suddenly slips on a banana peel (which mysteriously appeared out of nowhere) and his bag and its contents were sent flying. Slightly embarrassed by the whole incident, Kaoru immediately began to pick up his things. As Kaoru did that, Hikaru noticed something: The white bead landed right in Haruhi's rice, blending in almost perfectly. Just when he was about to retrieve it, Haruhi quickly grabbed the bead, along with some rice, with her chopsticks and ate it. Hikaru gasped. Upon seeing his brother's face and where he was staring, Kaoru quickly figured out why.

And thus, we return to our previous scenario.

The twins stared at Haruhi with a mix of shock, awe, and fear. Shock because she just swallowed the dang bead. Awe because she swallowed the bead _without noticing_. And fear because they were afraid that the thing could be poisonous if swallowed. Or it might get caught up in her gastrointestinal tract and cause some horrible complications!

"Haruhi!" the twins yelled in unison.

"What?" she said in response.

"You just--!" Hikaru started to say.

"You just--!" Kaoru repeated, stunned.

"Ate a bead!!!" they shouted together.

"Huh? I did?" Haruhi responded in a flat tone. She clearly didn't believe them.

"You did!" they cried in unison, "Didn't you notice?!"

"You could've choked!" Kaoru yelled.

"You swallowed a freaking bead! I mean, holy sh--" Hikaru hollered.

"Okay, okay, I believe you guys," Haruhi said, cutting Hikaru off, "But it's fine, don't worry about it."

"But-!" the Hitachiins protested.

"Class, please find your seats," instructed the teacher. With a sigh, Kaoru picked up his one possession that was still on the ground: The red bead. As the class began, he shoved the bead into his pocket, found his seat, and sat down.

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**NOTES **

**So, this is just a simple little crack story that my sister and I thought up. Like I mentioned, the idea is loosely based on the idea of Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Koro ni: Daybreak for the PC and the PSP. (I actually haven't played those games or watched/read the corresponding arc in HnNKn: Rei, so yeah.) Funny how it turned out better than my other story that I've spent ages on. XD Apologies for any inaccuracies._ Like the backwards colors of the beads._ I did that so Haruhi wouldn't detect the bead in her food. D: Anyway, story-wise, I have a pretty solid idea of how I want to end it, but I'm not so sure about the actual substance of the story. So, we shall see how far I can take it!  
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**The name's inspired off of an effect in Fable II; it was just perfect for this story.**

**Hope you enjoyed!**


	2. Illusion

**Disclaimer: Ouran, its characters, etc is owned by Bisco Hatori. Concept is loosely based on Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Daybreak. The original concept, set of characters, etc. of HnNKn is owned by Ryuukishi07 and 07****th**** Expansion.

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Animal Magnetism: Illusion

"_Bead…_" The single word shuffled around in Hikaru's mind. However, he was too focused on _other_ thoughts to pay it any mind.

He walked into Music Room 3 with a faraway look in his eyes. He was so deep in thought that he didn't even notice Tamaki's and Kyouya's quizzical glares. So deep in thought, he walked right _into_ couch rather than walking _around_ it. This raised Tamaki's and Kyouya's interest even more.

"What's wrong, Hikaru? Are you angry?" Tamaki asked playfully as Hikaru sat down. He shot an irritated glare at Tamaki.

"No," he spat.

"You sound angry," added Kyouya.

"No, I'm not 'angry'. I'm just… distracted," Hikaru answered. Tamaki and Kyouya each raised an eyebrow. He seemed pretty serious, for once.

"With what?" they both asked simultaneously.

"Well, it's Haruhi…" Hikaru began. But before he could finish his sentence, Tamaki flew into hysterics and grabbed Hikaru by his shirt collar.

"Haruhi?! What's wrong?!? Is she okay?!?" Tamaki shouted into Hikaru's face. Hikaru pulled Tamaki's hands off of him and backed away. He then took a deep breath.

"Define 'okay'," Hikaru responded, "She's not ill, at least I don't think so. But there's definitely something wrong with her."

Needless to say, that didn't help Tamaki's mood at all. He began to shout some things (Kyouya and Hikaru couldn't exactly decipher what) and dance an angry dance all around the room. For awhile, Kyouya and Hikaru watched in mild amusement. Then after a couple minutes passed, the two became bored of Tamaki's show and decided to continue their conversation.

"So Hikaru, expand," Kyouya said, "Tell me more about Haruhi."

"Oh, yeah," Hikaru replied, "She's acting really odd. I mean she's usually really focused on our classes, but today… Today, she was, get this, reading a fashion magazine under her desk. A _fashion_ magazine. _During_ class. And then after class…" Hikaru trailed off and cast his eyes to the ground, almost as if not wanting to remember.

"Go on…" Kyouya said, trying to encourage Hikaru to finish.

"…Follow me. You'll have to see it to believe it."

Hikaru then got up, motioned for Kyouya to follow him, and began to leave the room. Thinking that this event was a once-in-a-lifetime-thing-and-it-should-be-immortalized-on-film moment, Kyouya made sure to grab his camera before following Hikaru. Within a couple seconds of their departure, Tamaki stopped his dance and realized that they had left. He then raced after the two.

"_Bead…_" The word once again made an appearance in Hikaru's mind as he walked down the halls. He shook the thought away; he had more important things to worry about.

***

"_Bead…Set…Intended for… _" The disjointed words floated around in Kaoru's mind, but he had a hard time connecting them to anything; after all, it was really hard to focus when _Haruhi,_ of all people, was hitting on him. Haruhi scooted up very close to Kaoru and wrapped her arms around him. He responded by turning a very deep shade of red. The two were in the library, sitting side by side. He _had_ been trying to research the one bead that he had left, but that research came to a screeching halt when Haruhi came to join him.

"Why don't we ditch the Host Club today? We can go over to your house, and you can teach me more about fashion… among _other things_," Haruhi suggested while getting even closer to him, "I can model _any_ clothing you want me to… What do you say?"

He had to be dreaming. That was the only logical explanation. Haruhi would _never_ say anything like that, or act anything like this… Even though he wanted to embrace her, wanted to take her up on her offer, he knew that this couldn't be real. Plus, he couldn't betray Hikaru like that. He found himself backing away from her. She responded by moving even closer.

"Or, if going to your house is too much trouble, you can come over to mine! My dad's going to be gone until _really_ late tonight! So I can make you some dinner, then we can go to my room and—"

"U-um, Ha-Haruhi?" Kaoru stammered, "A-are you s-sure you're feeling okay?"

He once again tried to regain some of his personal space, but Haruhi would not allow it.

"If you want to go to the host club so badly, why don't _we_ do an act? Just you and me…" she suggested, evidently ignoring what he just asked her. He blushed at the thought and looked away from her. Saying _those_ kinds of things to Haruhi—he purged the fantasy from his mind before it could go too far. She paused for a moment, and then gently turned his head towards her.

"Kaoru, I wanted to bring this up for awhile now," she said solemnly, "I've seen the way you look at your brother during your 'brotherly love' acts. I know."

"K-know? Know what?" he asked.

"You despise every minute of that act. Don't try to deny it—I've seen the look in your eyes every time you two go at it. Your brother, he's like an animal. You loathe that about him; it limits your ability to play out that act," she whispered to him while inching even closer, "Humans and animals can never understand each other. But you and I? _We_ can understand each other…"

Haruhi leaned in towards Kaoru, even getting close enough to kiss.

"Talk to me, Kaoru," she murmured, "I can do things for you that your brother would never do for you; all you have to do is… tell me."

"Oh~! Are you seeing this?!" Renge asked to no one in particular while watching Haruhi and Kaoru with her opera spectacles. The crowd of girls around her nodded without tearing their gazes from the two; they didn't want to miss a single moment. Tamaki, Kyouya, and Hikaru approached the crowd of girls.

"See what?" Tamaki asked while trying to get through the girls. Without even looking in his direction, Renge pointed over to Haruhi and Kaoru. Tamaki froze. Even Kyouya was shocked at what he saw. He couldn't even ready the camera. Hikaru flinched at the sight.

"Aaargh! Kaoru!!" Tamaki shouted, "What did you do to my little girl?!?!"

Tamaki began to bolt towards Kaoru, ready to strangle him.

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**NOTES**

**Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed! **

**So leik, as some HnNKn fans might be able to tell, the old man finally got around to watching Rei, episode 5. The reason I bring this up is that some scenes/dialogue may seem very similar to that of the Daybreak chapter. Sorry! This old man has no creativity; once she sees something she deems funny/interesting, she has to base her own works off of it. orz**

**As you probably all noticed, I fail at romantic writing. OTL This story's goal is comedy, so it's all good, right? RIGHT?!**

**My editor, Ife, is on temporary testing leave. So if you see typos and the writing seems choppy and lame, that's why. :P I wanted to get this chapter up before the weekend ended (and also because I don't want to study for my own tests :S).**

**Who should be the next holder of the red stone, I wonder? **


	3. Morass

**DISCLAIMER: Ouran, its characters, etc is owned by Bisco Hatori. Concept is loosely based on Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Daybreak. The original concept, set of characters, etc. of HnNKn is owned by Ryuukishi07 and 07****th**** Expansion. **

**WARNING: OOCness, especially on Haruhi's part. **

**A/N: Special thanks to everyone who had reviewed! Those reviews really encourage me to keep writing! Nipa! **

**Also a special thanks to the five of you who have voted; the winner was Hikaru! [Insert applause]**

Please enjoy!

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**Animal Magnetism: Morass**

Tamaki ran towards Kaoru, ready to strangle him. Surely, Kaoru had done something to Haruhi to make her act that way. There was no other explanation. Never mind the fact that Kaoru looked uncomfortable; it _had_ to be his fault. Haruhi, however, wasn't going to stand by and watch as Tamaki attempted to strangle Kaoru. Nope, she had other plans. As soon as Tamaki was close enough…

"Argh~!" Tamaki yelped as Haruhi punched him in the gut. Tamaki stopped instantly, and then slowly sank to the ground. Kyouya, Hikaru, and Kaoru stared in complete shock, mouths agape. Tamaki lay on the ground, writhing in pain. Haruhi stared down at Tamaki with livid eyes.

"Hey. What makes you think that you can just go around, attempting to beat other people up, huh?" Haruhi asked in a threatening tone.

"H-Haruhi… Daddy was just… just trying to protect you…" Tamaki replied awkwardly. Truthfully, he was a little intimidated of her. She's been angry before, but this time she was just… pissed off. "_Never underestimate the power of a bourgeois,_" he thought to himself.

"I don't_ need_ your protection, Tamaki," Haruhi responded coldly, "Come on Kaoru, let's take our conversation elsewhere. I think some people have been eavesdropping."

With that, Haruhi grabbed Kaoru's arm and dragged him off. Normally he would have resisted, but today Kaoru was too shocked at the whole situation to resist being pulled around by her. As she hauled him off, the red bead that was in Kaoru's pocket fell out, landed on the ground, and rolled to an inconspicuous spot in the room.

"Sir, are you okay?" Hikaru asked, approaching Tamaki.

"N-no!" Tamaki shouted, while still lying on the ground, "Did you see how she looked at me?! She hates me!!"

Tamaki sobbed. Did Haruhi really hate him? Was she really in love with Kaoru? That couldn't be true. It just couldn't be…

There was no use in trying to comfort Tamaki, so Kyouya and Hikaru decided to scatter and try to figure out what was making Haruhi act so weird. In the meantime, Hikaru spotted the red bead on the floor and pocketed it. Kaoru would probably want that back as soon things went back to normal. Though he wasn't exactly sure when, or even if, things would go back to normal… but things would go back to normal eventually, right? There _had_ to be something causing Haruhi's strange behavior; he just had to find out what. And as soon as he did, then everything can go back to the way it was… exactly the way it was. He decided to hunt for his brother to see if his brother knew anything.

Meanwhile, Kyouya decided to look at the books that Kaoru had stacked up on the table. It looked like he had been researching something. One of the books remained open; Kyouya decided to take a look at that one first. It appeared to be about ancient accessories. The page that the book was open to described a pair of ancient stones, one red and one white; they were originally intended for a newly married couple. It seemed interesting, so he decided to read on. Apparently, these stones had a hex placed upon them; the holder of the white stone would unconditionally fall in love with the holder of the red stone. However, users of these stones have noticed that the holders of the white stone tend to become very amorous. _Too_ amorous. They would go so far as to act out of their normal range of personality. So, the stones eventually became labeled as dangerous and most sets were destroyed.

"Hmm… Interesting," Kyouya mused aloud. Haruhi's amorous behavior was pretty out there; perhaps she had come to possess the white stone somehow? If that was the case, then Kaoru would have to possess the red stone. Okay, if that was the problem, then the solution should be simple: All they would need to do is to take away the stones and destroy them. There: Problem solved.

"Tamaki, I think I may have found the source of our troubles," Kyouya announced. Tamaki still lay on the floor, crying his eyes out.

"Tamaki…" Kyouya once again called to his friend, hoping to actually get a response.

"…Hmm?" Tamaki reluctantly turned his gaze to Kyouya.

"I think I found the source of Haruhi's strange behavior," Kyouya stated. Tamaki perked up.

"Really? Really, really?!" Tamaki lifted himself off of the ground and gleefully ran towards Kyouya.

"Really, really," Kyouya replied.

***

Kaoru sat in his classroom, finally having some time to think clearly. Haruhi was sure acting strangely… he smiled at the memory of how she was behaving. It was embarrassing and a little awkward at the time, but the whole thing was kind of funny now that he thinks back. He couldn't help but think that it _was_ nice to have Haruhi pay special attention to him. But that wasn't the Haruhi that he knew; so it didn't mean anything. Though, if he could have just one wish… He quickly shook the thought from his head and refocused. He had to find some way to get her back to normal. He tried to remember what he had been reading before Haruhi distracted him; he had a feeling that it was really pertinent to the situation at hand… "_That's it!_" he thought.

Those beads that he found earlier! The book said something about them being a set and how they were intended for a married couple or something. Anyway, the _main_ bullet point was that the holder of the white one would unconditionally fall in love with the holder of the red one. That was it! She ate the white stone; that must count as 'holding' it. And he held the red stone! …Wait, where was it? He searched g he had dropped it somewhere. Ah, did he really lose it? That would explain why she had let him go… why didn't he figure that out sooner?! If someone got a hold of that stone, Haruhi would be all over him… or her. According to the book, if the two holders hold the stones long enough, the holder of the white stone would even be tempted to… go _all the way_…with the holder of the red stone. Kaoru suddenly gasped. "_Uh-… oh…_" he thought. He immediately began to retrace his steps and search for the small red stone; all while trying to keep the images of Haruhi hitting on another guy at bay.

***

Hikaru walked through the halls searching for his brother; surely Kaoru couldn't have gone that far. As he walked, he couldn't help but think back to how Haruhi was flirting with Kaoru so blantantly… and how it irritated him. Oh, how it irritated him. He shook his head trying to shake the feelings away; how could he feel such resentment towards his own brother? He should have just been happy. Happy that he was able to see Haruhi act so flirtatious; it was funny. Happy that his brother, rather than some stranger, was her target. So then, why did he feel so down?

"Hey, Hikaru." Suddenly, a voice broke Hikaru's train of thought. He looked up to see Haruhi standing right in front of him.

"H-Haruhi?" he stammered. He certainly didn't expect to run into her in the middle of the empty hallway.

"Hey there," she replied as she began to approach him. He began to feel a little nervous and backed away slightly.

"…Bet you heard all that; the stuff I said to your brother, that is," she began while still closing the gap between Hikaru and herself.

"Um… well, yeah…" Hikaru hesitantly responded. "_What the-?_" he thought.

"I do _like_ your brother," she continued, "But I _love_ you, Hikaru!"

He blushed. Now he _really_ didn't expect that.

The two stood in awkward silence for awhile. Hikaru couldn't think of what to say; he didn't foresee her confessing her love to him. Seriously, he didn't see it coming. "…_Please tell me that wasn't a lie…_" he thought, somewhat sadly. But he knew. There was no way that could be real; not with her recent behavior.

"Y-you really shouldn't go around saying things like that," he said with a laugh, "I might… believe you…"

He muttered the second part of his statement so softly that even he couldn't hear what he had said.

Haruhi approached Hikaru's side, and then took a few steps closer to him so that she was pressed up against his arm. She nuzzled him; he responded by blushing.

"Y-you don't have to s-stand so close…" he said nervously as he once again backed away from her. She then reclosed the gap between them.

"I really do like you, Hikaru… What'll it take for me to prove that to you?" Haruhi looked up at Hikaru with desperate eyes; could she really be serious? "_Stay by my side forever and smile? I could never wish for anything more…_" he thought.

"I know, wanna play some games? Loser plays a punishment game?" Haruhi cheerily suggested, "You like that sort of thing, right?"

"W-well, yeah," he responded.

"Once we're done playing games, we can go back to your place…" she whispered, "And you can show me how much of an _animal_ you can be."

"W-what?!" he sputtered. He stared at her in complete shock. Once again, he was at a loss for words. Is she _completely_ gone? Is it too late to bring her back?

"Confession time: I called you an animal to your brother," she admitted, "But that's not necessarily a _bad thing_."

She wrapped her arms around him and pressed up against him. He turned an even deeper shade of red. But before he could say anything, they both heard loud running noises. They each turned to see where the noise was coming from. One source was Tamaki running towards them with the intense look of a feral beast. Kyouya calmly walked behind Tamaki; it was surprising that he wasn't too far behind Tamaki. The other source of the noise was Kaoru running towards them from the other end of the hallway. Hikaru and Haruhi each shifted their gazes from Tamaki to Kaoru back to Tamaki. Having two parties running towards them from each end of the hallway; things didn't look good for the two. With absolutely no plan, Hikaru decided to just stand in the same spot and wait for Tamaki and Kaoru to crash into him; though he was a little worried that the two might crash into Haruhi instead. Remembering what Haruhi did last time; Hikaru quickly shoved her out of the way as soon as Tamaki and Kaoru got close enough.

Tamaki lunged at Hikaru, causing both to crash right into Kaoru. The red stone fell out of Hikaru's pocket and rolled away, strangely unnoticed by the three.

"Give up the red stone!" Tamaki shouted at Hikaru.

"Hikaru, where's that red bead?" Kaoru asked at the same time; though his voice was drowned out by Tamaki's shouting.

"What are you guys talking about?" Hikaru responded. The three began to shout and fight; there was no use in trying to reason with them at the moment.

"Wh-what happened?" Haruhi asked, somewhat regaining herself.

"_It looks like she doesn't remember the kinds of things she says or does to the people that hold the red stone_," Kyouya thought. He saw the red stone lying on the ground not too far away; now was the time to end everything by destroying that one stone. But just as he was about to retrieve the stone, Renge and some other raging fangirls stampeded in to the watch the fight between the boys, subsequently stepping on and kicking the little red stone around until it was misplaced indefinitely. Kyouya sighed. It looked as though solving this problem would be harder than he initially thought. Though _why_ did he actually think that it would be easy? Nothing dealing with the Host Club was easy. Nothing.

Wait, if he could get the white stone from Haruhi, then they wouldn't have to worry about finding the red stone. He turned towards Haruhi's direction; whoops, looks like she was gone too. Irritated, he adjusted his glasses and loudly cleared his throat. The three boys that were fighting earlier immediately heard his angry voice and immediately stopped right where they were. They looked up at Kyouya, and then scanned the area for Haruhi.

"Oh... crap," they said simultaneously.

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**Thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed!

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**More NOTES: **

**Confession time:** I didn't think Hikaru would win the poll, lol. I'm a pretty big fan of the Hika/Haru pairing, but I actually didn't plan to include a Hika/Haru scene in this story. Hopefully, the scene didn't turn out too awkwardly. XD

**Truth?** I didn't plan to put a Tama/Haru pairing scene in the fic either. The reason (for both Tama and Hii-hii) is that I wanted to only include humorous scenes of Haruhi hitting on the more 'out there' choices (Kyouya, Kaoru, Hunny, and/or Mori), some _really_ 'out there' choices (Nekozawa, Renge, and/or Benibara for the lulz).

**In Kyouya's case,** I actually wanted to include a Kyou/Haru scene, but since I ended up having him find out the power of the stones before actually holding the red stone, I just didn't think that he would be the type to purposely hold on the red stone knowing the effect that it would have on Haruhi. It would be a lie after all. XD

**In regards to Haruhi herself,** you guys can figure out that the **stone's power** is **occluding any of her common sense as well as her entire personality**. I can't emphasize that enough. She's going to be a bit of a heartbreaker in this story, but it's not her fault! D:


	4. Recoup

**DISCLAIMER: Ouran, its characters, etc is owned by Bisco Hatori. Concept is loosely based on Higurashi no Naku Koro ni Daybreak. The original concept, set of characters, etc. of HnNKn is owned by Ryuukishi07 and 07****th**** Expansion. **

**WARNING: OOCness, especially on Haruhi's part. **

**A/N: Once again, many thanks to those who reviewed~

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Animal Magentism: Recoup

"Haruhi's gone," the three boys stated simultaneously. They each stood up to gauge their surroundings. The squealing fangirls crowded around the three, hoping for a round 2.

"Ah, I'm sorry about the mess ladies! I assure you, there will be no more fighting for the day. And just to clarify, there will be no host club meeting today!" Tamaki said with a smile. The girls responded by slumping their shoulders with disappointment. One by one, the disappointed girls began to leave.

"Now that they're gone," Kyouya began, "We can finally begin coming up with some sort of plan to handle Haruhi's… situation."

"You guys figure out why she's acting so weird?" Hikaru asked.

"Yes, we have. The two stones that Kaoru brought to school with him apparently have some sort of hex placed on them," Kyouya explained.

"Hex…?" Hikaru muttered.

"The one who holds the white stone will unconditionally fall for the one who holds the red stone," Kyouya continued.

"And the holder of the white stone will even feel compelled to…" Kaoru began. He hesitated; he didn't know if he wanted to say the rest.

"Compelled to…?" Hikaru and Tamaki both asked.

"Go… all the way… with the holder of the red stone…" Kaoru finished.

"What?!" Hikaru asked, stunned.

"What?!!" Tamaki repeated, only louder. His mind buzzed. Go all the way?! He began to imagine Haruhi sitting on a bed… removing her clothes…

"We must find her immediately," Kyouya stated coolly, interrupting the Theater of Tamaki's mind, "If this keeps up, someone might find out that she's female. We have some options: We can hunt for the red stone and destroy it, or we can hunt for Haruhi and get her to a hospital to have her stomach--"

"That probably won't work," Kaoru interrupted, "According to the book, once someone consumes the stone, it dissolves and its power becomes attached to the person who consumed it. The only way to remove it is to have someone lift the spell. Our only option there would be…"

"Nekozawa…" Hikaru finished.

"So, we find Haruhi and take her to Nekozawa to have the spell lifted!" Tamaki announced, apparently now out of his stupor, "Gentlemen, we must go find Haruhi and save her dignity! Away!"

"Away!" Kaoru repeated, "…To where?"

"Before Haruhi started hitting on Kaoru, she started to read fashion magazines. Remember I told you guys? Maybe she did a little research on her next, um, target too… Let's start in our classroom" Hikaru suggested. Surprisingly sound advice, coming from Hikaru.

The boys, Tamaki and the twins rather, raced towards Haruhi's classroom. Kyouya calmly followed the trio, debating the group's next actions.

***

"Are those… Cooking magazines specializing in desserts?" The three boys stare at Haruhi's desk, now cluttered with cooking magazines and books.

"You don't think…" Hikaru started.

"That she'd hit on…" Kaoru continued.

"Hunny?" the twins asked simultaneously. The two couldn't imagine what that would even look like.

"Well, maybe she's just hitting on someone else who likes sweets," Tamaki suggested.

"Like whom?" the twins asked while staring their Boss down.

"Um… There are plenty of other people who like cakes and other sweets!" Tamaki retorted, feebly trying to defend himself. However, even Tamaki knew that there was no other person in the world who adored cakes like Hunny did. Other boys in particular couldn't compete with Hunny's sweet tooth.

"_Wait a minute,_" Tamaki thought, "_What if—what if the holder of the red stone isn't even a boy? Then what?_"

"Hey Kyouya, the red stone's powers will only work on boys, right? Since Haruhi's a girl?" Tamaki turned to his best friend for an answer, hoping to hear the answer he was looking for.

"…From what I gather, the stone's power is indiscriminate," Kyouya replied.

"So… y-you're saying that Haruhi could be hitting on some girl right now?!" Tamaki was shaken at the thought. The thought of Haruhi trying to get some girl into bed—how would that even work?! The more Tamaki thought about it, the more upset he became. He didn't even know which was worse: The thought of Haruhi seducing a guy, or the thought of her seducing a girl. Before Tamaki could answer his own question, he heard someone screaming.

Just then, Hunny tore into the room looking like he had seen a ghost, with Mori, also shaken, following.

"Hey Hunny. We were just going to go look for you," the twins told Hunny casually, ignoring the fact that he was in a complete panic.

"Guys! Haru's acting really weird! Really weird!" Hunny shouted in a shaky voice.

"Really weird," Mori added.

"Oh we know," Kyouya responded coolly, "She's been acting like this since her last class ended."

"No!! She's acting really weird! At first, she started getting really close and said that we should get to know each other better! But then, she started saying some really strange stuff like 'Touch me'. And then she smacked my ass! _My_ ass! My sweet, innocent ass!" Hunny stammered.

"It was shocking, to say the least," Mori added.

The twins began to crack up. Even Kyouya cracked a smile. Haruhi, smacking Hunny's behind. The image in their minds was priceless.

"While we didn't know the specifics of what she did to you, we did know about Haruhi's odd behavior," Tamaki said soothingly, trying to calm Hunny down, "For that reason, we need to ask you to give us the red stone that you have."

"What red stone?" Hunny inquired.

"It looks like a small, red bead," Kaoru explained, "It's also round and flat-ish on one side."

Hunny thought for a moment. Ah, that's right; he did pick up a small, red thing earlier. But where did he put it? He began to search his pockets.

"Hmm… I don't think I have it anymore. It must have fallen out when I ran from Haru," Hunny replied.

Tamaki and the twins all hang their heads. They began to wonder if it was even possible to get that damn stone back.

"Where did you last see her?" Kyouya asked, still retaining his cool.

"Um… Takashi and I were heading for Music Room 3 when I saw her," Hunny answered.

"To the Music Room! Away!" Tamaki commanded. With that, the group made a beeline for Music Room 3.

***

Music Room 3 was silent. There was no activity in there, and no signs of Haruhi. Not even a pile of magazines or books to tell the group who her next target was. The group sighed. Trying to get Haruhi and that stone back was no easy task. Hunny perked up when he saw the Black Magic Club's door open. Maybe she was in there…?

"Hey guys, maybe we should look in there?" Hunny advised. There was nothing to lose by taking a look, so the other group members agreed. After much debate, the boys all pushed Tamaki forward and expected him to take the first look. Though irritated, Tamaki cautiously peered in through the open door and into the dark, candlelit room.

Haruhi sat right next to Nekozawa, content. Nekozawa himself looked pretty neutral. He didn't seem discontent, he didn't seem nervous, he didn't seem disgusted; he just seemed pretty cool with Haruhi's affection. In fact, he seemed pretty happy that he had a new club member. Haruhi snuggled up against his arm, looking completely satisfied.

"Haruhi!" Tamaki cried. He dashed into the room to pull Haruhi away from Nekozawa. Haruhi responded by glaring at Tamaki, telling him, without words, to back off. Tamaki's running came to a screeching halt. The other Host club members begin to come into the room; Mori stopping right at the door to ensure that no one would leave the room. The hosts now had two options: Ask Nekozawa to return the red stone, or ask him to lift the spell off of Haruhi. Deciding that destroying the red stone would be simpler, Kyouya decided on the former.

"Nekozawa, by any chance, have you come across a small red stone?" Kyouya asked.

"You mean this?" Nekozawa replied. He held out his hand to reveal the red stone that had caused the group so much trouble.

"Yes, that!" Tamaki barked. Without changing the smiling expression on his face, Nekozawa began to put the stone back into his pocket.

"That stone is property of the Hitachiin family! Please return it!" Kaoru demanded.

"Hmm? I don't recall the Hitachiin family being able to make such powerful charms," Nekozawa replied.

"It was found in _our _yard. So it's _ours_." Hikaru said sharply.

"Your family would have no use for this charm," Nekozawa responded, "Plus, it's nice to have a girl completely devoted to me! With her by my side, I shall spread the word on the black magic club! And soon, the whole school will be involved in the black magic club!"

"You tell 'em, Nekozawa," Haruhi said to Nekozawa while snuggling up next to him.

Guess Haruhi influenced Nekozawa more than the hosts originally thought. He seemed far more ambitious than usual.

"Blah blah blah, it doesn't matter that our family has no use for that charm, it's still ours!" Hikaru retorted, "Don't make me get my flashlight!"

Nekozawa froze. He wasn't fond of the flashlight. Especially when it was aimed into his face. It was almost as bad as being out in broad daylight.

"You want us to get the flashlight?" Kaoru asked with a wicked grin, "We'll get the flashlight, alright."

Nekozawa flinched. Now why didn't he expect those damn twins to pull out a flashlight? Stupid, stupid, stupid… Well, it didn't matter now.

Deciding that it was easier to give up the stone than to battle the flashlight, Nekozawa dug the red stone out of his pocket and started to make his way towards the twins to hand them the stone. But just as he was about to hand them the stone, he tripped on his cloak and the stone was sent flying. Tamaki dove out to try and catch it, but instead grazed it, making the stone fly off in a different direction.

At the same moment, Haruhi (now completely confused as to what's going on) yawned. She felt like she had been run over by a truck.

"_What was I doing all day?_" she thought. Suddenly, she felt something land in her wide-open mouth. Before she could even think to spit it out, her swallowing reflex kicked in and she swallowed the thing.

The Hosts stared in shock. They didn't know what to expect when the same person consumed both! Perhaps the power of the two stones would neutralize each other? In the worst case scenario, they could still have Nekozawa lift the spell off of Haruhi…

Haruhi looked off into the distance, with a tender expression on her face. The Hosts stared quizzically.

"I—I never realized it," Haruhi began. Tamaki began to approach her, with the other Hosts following suit. With the Host distracted, it was a perfect opportunity for Nekozawa to slither out the door. And he did just that.

"Never realized what? Are you okay?" Tamaki asked with concern. Haruhi continued to stare off into the distance like she didn't care about what he had just asked.

"Haru?" Hunny also tried to get Haruhi's attention, but to no avail.

"I never realized…Never realized just how disproportionally talented and beautiful I am compared to the average person!" Haruhi finished.

The Hosts all scrambled to pick their jaws up from the ground. What did she just say?! As if to add an extra exclamation point to her statement, Haruhi hugged herself and sank to her knees.

"If I was a guy… I would totally do me," Haruhi said softly. The Hosts' minds spun. It was weird to see her hit guys, but even weirder to see her hit on herself.

"A-Ah…. H-Haruhi?" Tamaki said shakily.

"S-she's in love with herself!" Hunny exclaimed.

"No s**t, Sherlock," Hikaru responded, "Where the hell did Nekozawa go?!"

Just as the twins began to rush out the door to look for Nekozawa, Kyouya calmly placed his hands on their shoulders.

"No, no. Leave her as she is," Kyouya said with a sly smile, "It will be interesting…"

* * *

**NOTES**

**And that, as they say, is that! Yay~! I finished it! I'm pretty happy with the results; certainly not the next great American novel, but I had fun writing it~ **

**There were some characters that I wanted to include, but I felt like it would just make the story drag on too long. However, I might include some bonus chapters with alternate endings in the future. :3**

**Oh, and obvious note, but I'm assuming that Nekozawa knows Haruhi's a girl in this fanfiction. YEAH.  
**


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